Attending behavior is very important to effective interviewing. Attending involves the things we do which communicate to clients that we are listening and ready to respond. It carries the message that we are there with the client, that the client is important to us and deserves our attention. Effective attending behavior also makes our listening more effective; it puts us in a position and a frame of mind which increases our chances of hearing, seeing, and otherwise sensing what we need to pay attention to in order to be most helpful. There are several things which we do to attend.
1. Distance. Maintain an appropriate distance from your client. You need to be close enough to hear and be heard, to communicate that you are involved, and to reach out to touch if necessary. At the same time you do not want to invade the personal space which people need around them to be comfortable. There are many factors which influence how much space we need and how much closeness we prefer. Big people, especially men, need more distance. There are subcultural and age differences. There are infinite individual differences which mean that you need to be very sensitive to the issue of distance when interviewing all the different people you will see. There is a general rule that four and a half feet is a good starting point. If possible, give your client the opportunity to move closer or farther away by providing a chair with casters or which moves easily, and respect their decisions about distance when they make them.
2. Orientation. One of the most important things we can do to attend is to sit or stand facing the client squarely. Most interviews are conducted with both the worker and client sitting, and it is important to be aware that the chair which you are using is oriented to face the client as much as possible. This communicates that the client is the center of our attention. It lets those people whom we are helping know that we are there for them.
3. Posture. It is also important to have an open and relatively erect posture when interviewing. Make sure that you are not crossing your arms and legs, especially your arms. A closed posture communicates that you are not receptive to what the client has to say. Opening up communicates your willingness to hear, that you are open to what the client has to say. This does not mean that you are sprawled-out; it does mean that your arms are at your side and your feet are on the floor. You should be erect enough to be alert, but not rigid. It is OK to have your back against the back of your chair, but you should not be leaning back, and for most of us it is good to bend forward at times, especially when we are listening to something that the client is saying which is especially important.
4. Eye-contact. With most clients it is valuable to maintain frequent, but not constant, eye-contact. We want to pay attention to what our client is saying but we do not want to get into a staring-match. Sometimes we need to be especially sensitive to cultural differences regarding eye-contact, there is a wide variation as to how much is accepted. We do not want people who are taught to avoid eye-contact to be put in uncomfortable situations. The Cultural Diversity course which is required for a social work degree is an excellent source of information about those kinds of differences. When we do use eye-contact it is important to remember that it does not always, and usually should not, have to be eye-to-eye contact. We can pay attention and show that we are listening by watching our client's mouth and gestures. We need to be careful never to stare at parts of the body which make people feel uncomfortable, but be do need to attend to body language.
5. Reduce mannerisms. We need to minimize the things we do which can be distracting. Most everyone has nervous habits or mannerisms which can be annoying, or at least irritating to someone who has important ideas to communicate. Social workers need to avoid stretching, fidgeting, scratching, or doing similar things. It is certainly natural to change position during the course of an interview which may last as long as an hour, but movement should not be distracting. One way to do this is to use the time when we are speaking rather than listening to shift our weight or otherwise move. If you need to get up, invite the client to do the same or offer an explanation.
6. Be comfortable. Most of all it is important to communicate to your clients that you are comfortable. If you are comfortable it will increase their ability to be so. This advice may contradict some of the above ideas, but it is should always be considered. Exceptions can be made in order to be comfortable. For example, many women are taught to cross their legs or the ankles in order to sit properly. I remember my grandmother reminding my sister how to 'sit like a lady.' Social workers have grandmothers too and we all need to respect what our bodies have learned over the years. It is also valuable to continue to train yourself to be the best social worker possible. Be comfortable when you are attending to your clients, but teach yourself to become more and more comfortable doing those thing which clearly communicate that your clients are important and you want to be tuned into them.
It is also true that the clothes you wear and the other things you do are important to consider as attending behavior. Social workers should be aware that clients will form impressions based on the way we look, how we sound, and even how we smell. These types of cues are very important in our culture. We communicate status and role distinctions by the way we dress and otherwise present ourselves.
1. Clothing. Social workers should look professional but not like they are overinvested in fashion or status. The clothing we wear should communicate that we are competent but not trying to show off. Different outfits are appropriate for different client populations and work places. If you spend part of your time playing on the floor with children, you need to wear clothes which permit that easily. I use to work with delinquent adolescents who were intimidated by men in ties. They looked like authority figures who were there to restrict or punish, so I learned not to wear a tie. My clients knew, however, that it was in their best interest if I wore a tie when we needed to go to court together, so they thought it was pretty cool that I always had a tie and jacket on the back of my door for those occasions.
2. Jewelry. Another way we modify our appearance is through the use of jewelry. Here again the most important thing to think about is the impact which your use of jewelry will have on clients. It is certainly appropriate to wear wedding rings and other things that have meaning, but it is not a good idea to flash expensive pieces which are intended to impress people. We should impress clients with our competence and concern, not with material things. Use your jewelry to make a statement about who you are and make sure that statement is consistent with your professional responsibilities.
3. Scent. The principle is much the same here. Social workers should be presentable but not overwhelming. We need to be clean and certainly not offensive, but we don't need to smell like the perfume counter at the local department store.